The Natural Cycle of Life and Death -- and Life

IF YOU WERE A FLOWER: THE NATURAL CYCLE OF LIFE

An excerpt from our latest book, 

Only Gone From Your Sight: A Personal Approach to Human Grief & Loss

"Even the tiniest perennial grows only to die. It comes back again and again when the season and the time is right. Even annual flowers grow seeds as they grow so that they can drop the seeds of themselves and live again year after year, life after life." 

The Lizard from Rainbow Bridge, Chapter 11

Nature continually reminds us of the natural cycles of life. If you were a flower, when the harshness of winter comes you would pull yourself deep inside to protect yourself from freezing, to prevent yourself from dying. You toughen up the outside, close yourself up and go deep within where you are always safe.

Then after quite a long while there comes a bit of warmth and a welcoming day brings with it the thaw. Spring comes and something inside of you stirs. You realize you’ve survived another winter. The ice melts away and you can feel the outside of yourself again. As the warmth so long gone from your life surrounds you, you decide maybe it’s worth blooming again for another season. Hope returns to your heart as you prepare for new life.

You begin to open again as the sun fuels your soul. Your energy returns. An infusion of life force comes to you, giving you more power than you have known since you went into hibernation. This power is the force that pushes you to develop your stems, to press through the soil, to stretch forth and reach towards the light again.

Sometimes Spring can make you an April fool, bringing a bluff! What you planned on, the rain that waters your roots so that you can grow again, turns unexpectedly to ice then snow and it finds you unsuspecting. You are vulnerable and alone, exposed and unprotected. Your tender life is threatened. In some seasons the storm will pass quickly and you will survive; other seasons you can be hurt so deeply that you must withdraw and retreat deep into your roots where you will take the remaining seasons off to rebuild yourself and prepare for the distant day when Spring returns and gives you another chance to thrive.

Despite everything in this year you have survived and in the next season you will grow hardy and beautiful, thriving for the harshness that once threatened you. The early blooms that sprouted, only to be frozen, pinched back by Nature Herself, are destined to return brighter and stronger than ever.

This is the YOU that has grown from the cold harsh winter of your loss. You are the flower that is destined to bloom again. You are the root. You are the bloom. You are the spirit; you are the soul that lives inside every living thing. With each passing season you become stronger and wiser. You go deeper and deeper within where your power can be found. Your roots reach further and further into the quiet nourishing protective earthy space that surrounds you. Look how far you’ve come from being the fragile shoot that first made itself known in the landscape of life!

Your colorful blooms will burst forth stretching now to the sky and you’ll show no fear because you know that no matter what happens you will adjust to the climate that surrounds you and you will be okay. It’s what you’ve learned.

And so it goes.

The Key to a Love that Lasts Forever

Letting Go doesn't mean you don't love them anymore. Letting Go doesn't mean you won't miss them anymore. You'll always remember. You can never cut the ties that bind two souls together who truly love each other. What you DO need to cut is the Leash of Grief and Guilt that binds them to you and prevents them from doing what is best for them.

As They say, set something free and if it was yours to begin with, it will come back. It's natural law, in Heaven and on Earth and in all the spaces in between life and death and life. Your loved ones cannot come back from a place they have not yet arrived. 

If you are looking for Signs and not finding them, take a look at what you are doing. If your best friend is still on the leash of your grief, your best friend is not yet free to be everything he or she can be. 

Letting Go is the most important thing you can do for both of you. It is the ultimate act of faith... and you will be rewarded for it. 

Breathe. Then Let Go. It's time.

You say you love. Do you love them enough to let them go? 

Do you trust them enough to have the faith that they will never leave?  

"'Do not cling to me,' said Jesus, 'for I have not yet ascended to the Father.'"

John 20:17

(Jesus to Mary Magdalene) 

A Day in the Life of a Dream

My Poem. 

In Honor of National Poetry Month on National Pet Day.  

Look around at what you've got. 

What you value matters not.

The eyes of love see everything.

Let the ones who love you bring

The meaning of this life to you:

To learn to love before you're through. 

Beyond this place is a world that's true

Not this dream you thought was you. 

Things are not what they may seem.

It's just a day within a dream. 

You're Gone...

You're gone.

Just another case of

Not getting what I thought I wanted.

Instead 

I'll get what I'm supposed to have

Because the Powers That Be

Can make much better decisions for me

Than I can.

Meditation on a Dozen Roses ❤️

Each perfect flower picked by you

Now full in bloom, at beauty's peak

Each rose opens ripe and red and true

As if to say "Here I am!

I entrust myself to you."

Like love that's unconditional

The blooms unfold with innocence.

They share with us their gentle gifts

They know not how to have defense.

Like you and me, they're in their prime!

How to keep alive and well

Though time's passage threatens

To bring with it the thorns

Of change, of loss and unplanned pain....

My time with you is cherished.

Will every shared and lovely moment

That I long to keep in bloom

Soon fade in it's own time?

The rose, divided from its roots

Has no choice but to fade and dry

But love that grows from roots of truth

Also has no choice; it cannot die.


Excerpt from "One Heart's Journey"

Rite of Passage

Life is all about the experience

And the expression

Of feeling.

It keeps dishing out opportunities

To feel

Good and bad.

When that happens

We either come through

Our rite of passage,

Or we smother the opportunity,

Burying it with our chosen painkillers;

Anxiety, addiction, depression....

Push the feelings away

And maybe one day

You won't feel anything.

You can become an inanimate object.

And life will still keep dishing it out

In the hopes that one day

You will learn

What it hopes to teach you.

All I Have to Do is Dream....

"She had a dream last night. In her distress she turned and I was there and then she knew she'd be okay.

We use dreams to connect with you. We find our way into your unconscious mind to remind you that we're always there. I know it's hard to believe right now, but someday you will find that nothing of the world was really worth being so upset about. One day you will wake up in Paradise just like she woke up from her dream today. You will see that it was all just a silly ride!

Hang in there. It will fly by in the blink an eye. Don't simply endure it; find a way to enjoy it. I'll see you in your dreams... and on the other side when the time is right for you to return to me."

From: "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master"

Dreams are awesome, aren't they?  Sometimes they are just a mixed up bunch of "debris" that we are sorting out (we often decide whether to store things in our short term or long term memory when we are dreaming -- so dreams can help us sort through the things that aren't necessary and also help us to process the things that are.) 

Dreaming is like going to another plane -- where your soul joins the souls of others to accomplish what you need to accomplish with them.  

Life is the school, love is the lesson. Dreams are our teachers too.  

An Open Book, But I Don't Tell All.....

Lo, praise for the epic scenes ne'er told

So many from the days of old.

When time was young and youth was new

And love was pure and true.

Many sagas I could write

Of those who tried to win my heart

Or me theirs.

Through hoops and fields of memory run

The words that speak Of Life and Love

Kept inside, a silent prayer,

That one will come and remain there,

Through tests of time and storm and strife

The reason others went astray...

The one who is my Love for life.

Planning for the Inevitable: Learn to Communicate Ahead of Time

Hi Jack, 
It has been a long time and when it is too hard for my human brain to know, I must come back to you. My Balto is 12 years old. He still looks like a baby but he is having increasing issues with osteoarthitis. His Vet asked me if I wanted to try laser treatment to ease the pain. I wonder if this will work? I just want to be sure he will let me know ahead of time so I do not let him suffer...On the other hand I want Him to have a quiet life.  I don't know much about his life before he came to me. He was 9 years old when we met in a shelter. I really hope I will understand his signs when they come to me. Sometimes Veterinarians are only doing their job but in the same time I want to try everything to ease his pain. I am a little bit lost. Anyway I can at last feel his love now. I am sorry if this message is not clear. And as I told Kate I have your Book close to me...... ♡♡♡♡
Love, 
Balto's "Mom" 


Dear Mom, 
The energy of your message is very clear because you write from a place of love and I always understand love. Please say Hi to Balto for me. If you can get a product called Dasaquin, it helped me a lot. I was struggling a bit moving around too and once we went on that I was like a puppy again -- all the way till the end. I don't know if it will work for Balto but it worked for me. Start with that... and then the laser if it doesn't work. 

I am glad you keep my book close to you because that is where I can always remind you that everything is okay, even if it doesn't feel like it is at the moment.  

I must tell you that the most important thing you can do these days is to sit quietly with Balto. Put your hand on his heart and the other hand on yours. Tell him that you want to learn to communicate with each other through your hearts and that you may need his help with this. This is where he will communicate with you when he is "gone from your sight" one day.  Sit quietly with him, breathe with him, feel your hearts together. It will be good for both of you.

Whenever the world gets to be too much, with your hands on your hearts everything always seems better because it reminds you that your power is in your heart, not your head.

Love, 
Jack

The End of This Life is Not the End of Life

When you are grieving, you cannot really learn anything new until your mind and heart are healed and open to new information. 

In my next book Jack shares his usual wisdom and inspiration as he helps the reader to walk through the five stages of grief. Then he reveals what life is like on the other side of Rainbow Bridge. Full of love and miracles, his story will tell you how his Master in Heaven allows him the free will to make some very important choices, such as the one to return to earth to love again and be loved again.  

We also share the story of how we found Joey, Jack's little terrier brother, and how Jack was able to choreograph the adoption of Immy, the Afghan Hound who would come to be adopted into the space that Jack left behind. 

Join us as we learn together the power of love and faith. This is our story, it is your story. It is the story of life, love and renewal. Come! Be our friend as we travel this journey together to Rainbow Bridge and back again.

                     

The end of this life is not the end of life. 

You can find the Jack McAfghan Trilogy on Amazon Worldwide. Click Here to read the reviews and preview: 
The Jack McAfghan Trilogy by Kate McGahan

Try to Go With the Flow

Hi, Jack here!  
I remember spending some weekends at the river. We'd hang out on the edge with our feet in the water. Quite often someone in an inner tube would come along or a colorful kayak would glide by. We'd all say "Hi!" and "Hello!"; the ones on the shore and the ones in the water. We might all have a moment to chat as they floated by --depending on the strength of the river's current -- but all too soon we were all saying "Goodbye!"  My tail would be wagging as they arrived and it would still be wagging as they had left. I was just always so happy to see everbody! Whether they coming or whether they were going!

It's kind of like life. We come and we go. It's a constant ebb and flow. 

Embrace the moment. Embrace everyone who comes your way, then be willing to let them go when it's time to say goodbye, thankful for the gift of knowing them.  

Jack's Sequel Is Coming Soon. Here's a Glimpse.

"Jack McAfghan: Return from Rainbow Bridge"

The end of this life is not the end of life.

Life never ends.

Love never dies. 

Stay tuned for our next book which is due for publication this Fall!

So Do Pets Go To Heaven or Not???

Dear Jack (I can't believe I am writing a letter to a dog):

No animal goes to heaven. St. Thomas stated and the Church approves: "The soul of an animal after death returns to the potency of matter." Anything contrary is simply fiction and nonsense.

Anon E Mouse

Dear Anon, 

Now that I am in Heaven, I join the common mind which knows Everything.  That said, since you are a doubter (much like the St.Thomas who you refer to in your note to me), I will provide a link to a reputable source to reveal the Truth. As an apostle of Jesus Christ, St. Thomas was transformed from doubter to believer. Click here to read more about that.  

I also would like to clarify that we do not "live" at Rainbow Bridge. A lot of people think we do. Rainbow Bridge is just the passageway by which we reach the Other Side. The other side is Heaven.  We cross the Bridge and we wait for you on the other side. When it's your time to cross the bridge into Heaven, we are the first ones waiting at the edge of Rainbow Bridge to greet you. So yes, we live in Heaven.

But 'How do you know that pets go to Heaven?' you ask. 
How do I know? ...

 I know because The Bible tells me so. 

I know because animals have a soul and souls return to Heaven when they are done experiencing life on earth. 

I know... because animals have eyes in which you can see the entire universe. If Eyes Are The Windows Of The Soul, this is further proof that animals have a soul. 

I know this because Pope Francis (like his beloved namesake, St. Francis) tells me so. 

Source: ABC Nightly News and Google Images. 

I KNOW. I mostly know because I know where I am. I am there. I am Here. I am in Heaven. I am in Life Everlasting. I AM Life Everlasting. We all are.

"Life goes on and something is always turning into something else. I now know this for sure: Love is all there is and love never dies. Love is energy and energy does not die; it cannot die. Einstein would tell you that it is a proven scientific fact. If it’s energy, it must live, although sometimes it changes form.

Love does not sleep. I am not dead. I am awake."

("Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" Chapter 66)

Now Kate knows -- without a doubt-- because she wrote my book and she never planned on writing it. She never planned on my reaching out to her to give her a message to give the rest of the grieving doubting world. 

I know because I know.

I'll See You At Rainbow Bridge

Kate made a video the other night and when she learns something I learn something too. After all, we are always connected. So last night I made a video too!  You can view it here. It's just a few minutes long and it gives you a unique view of Rainbow Bridge.

 

Can a Pet Determine When It's Time to Cross the Bridge?

Dear Jack, 

I was told that animals are able to determine the way and time they will pass from this world into the next. Could this be true? 

Caroline

Dear Caroline,

Your pets know what's going on. They probably know even better than you do because they are very tuned in to Spirit, living in the moment and being hyper-alert to how they feel within themselves and the world around them.

When a pet lives a long life into older age or if a pet is sick and has time to process the illness and eventual outcome, no matter what the age, they have an element of control. They have control over the Where, the When and the How. Just like people do. It is not always the case when there is an accident or a sudden trauma. When trauma or sudden accident happens, there is a moment just prior to the impact when your pet leaves its body. So there is no pain at the end of life. Typically they never know what hit them and if they do, they have an "Aha" moment of realizing "This is it" and by the moment that thought finishes, they are already heading for Rainbow Bridge ....while the drama and human questions and suffering take place at the scene.  

Many people feel bad that they were not with their pet at the moment it passed, but this was because the pet did not want its Beloved to witness the final moments which would be imprinted on the memories of a chaotic mind and take away from the joy and pure love of the memories shared. In the case of narcotics and medication, pets are also a lot like people -- when they take a powerful medication, it reduces their awareness and their alertness. Like a person on morphine, they will simply slip into sleep and wake up at Rainbow Bridge. When they are medicated, the medicine often decides the when, the how and the where -- not the pet. We are not so different from people this way.  Also, like with people, there are exceptions.  If someone is in enough pain or discomfort, sometimes they would rather go to sleep. The comfort can be more important than the awareness in certain situations.  

If you read my book, you read about the process I went through when I became sick, when I declined, and when I crossed Rainbow Bridge. You read about how obedient I alway was, but at the end I did not want to take my medication. It wasn't just because it tasted awful (and it was awful!) but I did not want to be sedated. I wanted to be aware of my Beloved who was there by my side and I wanted to be fully present with her in my final hours and in my departure. Because I was present, I was able to write the book, with her good help, that explains all of this in detail. I was able to be fully present in my leaving her to cross the Bridge. Click here to see my book and read the reviews.  ("Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master"- available on Amazon and most other booksellers worldwide).

There is also the question of Euthanasia. Why do people find themselves responsible for making the dreaded decision to help their pet to cross the Rainbow Bridge?  There is always a reason. Sometimes the person needs to learn how to make a decision.... or they have lessons to learn from making the decision and living with it.  Putting a pet to sleep can wreak havoc on a person's feelings of guilt, shame and self-blame.  Life on earth (for a human, not for a pet) has to do with learning the lessons needed to LET GO of the guilt and shame and blame of life. Guilt and Shame and Blame are things the human mind created to make themselves or others feel bad. Guilt and Shame and Blame are not real and they do not exist at Rainbow Bridge or in a mind that is full of only LOVE. They only exist in a mind that is filled with fear. Us animals don't understand this, but we accept that it is part of life for you and we do our best to teach you love and forgiveness in the time we have together with you.  

Growth from learning is always built into the act of making a difficult decision such as this. Life on earth is the School and True Love is the Lesson and everything you go through on earth is designed to teach you and bring you closer to being the fully loving person you are in your heart and in your soul. This means loving others, but loving yourself as well. Your mind is not always your friend. Your heart always knows the right answer. Your heart knows everything. This is why we animals know what we know. We pay more attention to our hearts than our heads. We always did. Fear lives in the human mind. Love lives in the human heart. Love is always more powerful than fear. We know this. This is why we live in the power of love. Love directs our course, not fear. Love is more powerful than anything else. Love is what lives on, long after we have crossed the Bridge. 

It takes time but if you ultimately learn to live in the moment, can be loving and forgiving of yourself -- the way we taught you to love unconditionally -- you will move forward, grow into a New You, a New Normal, and you will be stronger and more loving than ever.  This is what we are eagerly waiting for! We are watching and waiting -- and celebrating when we see that you have healed and have learned to live your life in love the way that we always did.

We are here at Rainbow Bridge. We love you and we are waiting for you to love yourself and embrace life again. You. You will determine the How and the When and the Where of your healing. You don't feel like you have control over it, but you do. Some day -- if you are fortunate to live to a ripe old age, you will see what I am talking about. You will see you have a part in the decision and an element of control in the dying process.  And when you decide it's your time to go, we'll be waiting for you here. After you've learned all the lessons you need to know to come here.  

Thank you for writing. I hope this helps.  

Love, 

Jack

Dear Jack: I Didn't Get To Say GoodBye

Abby (R) and Clyde (L)

Dear Jack, 

I am missing my sweet Clyde today. It has been almost 5 months since he crossed over Rainbow Bridge. There isn't a day that goes by where somewhere in the stillness I will think of Clyde and feel like he should still be here with me.

3 y.o. SofiaBella says, "He didn't die. He's in Heaven."

The last couple of years I feel he was here on borrowed time. He had cardiomyopathy and I know he had struggled every day.

With heart medication, acupuncture and lots of love I am thankful we had the extra time with him. The day I took him to the vet because he was getting sick I never imagined he would have to have surgery the next day to remove his spleen and a kidney due to a rare form of cancer. He actually survived the surgery. Upon waking from the anesthesia he went into cardiac arrest. My vet tried CPR.... For 45 minutes. I just worry that he wondered where I was? I worry that he felt I left him. I didn't get to say goodbye.

Dear Clyde, 

I love you and miss you and I will remember you all the days of my life until we meet again my friend.❤

Love, 

Dianne 

Dear Dianne,

Your Clyde is an amazing soul.  Humans come to earth to Learn To Love and us dogs come to earth to Be Loved. Clyde says no one on earth could have loved him more than you did. When he was sick, you were there for him. You made him more important than many of the other details that humans tend to focus on. You both needed to go through Borrowed Time to learn what you learned. To love on Borrowed Time is bittersweet. Your heart grew and grew and grew while the two of you went through all the creative treatments. You both learned so much from all of it!  Mostly you learned how much you loved one another.  

What Clyde especially wants me to explain to you is that when he was under anesthesia the day of surgery, that was  when the angels were communicating with him. You know how we say that dreams are real and that life is illusion?  He was in a dream while he was in surgery. He visited Rainbow Bridge. I met him that day. We all embraced him and told him what to expect. He seemed very comfortable with it and was eager to come to be with us. When he woke up, he immediately remembered the Plan. He knew that he had to come to Rainbow Bridge. The moment he woke up he knew this and that is why his heart seized. He was being called and he knew he had to leave. 

It's So Beautiful Here

It is quite a dynamic for us when we realize that we are going to Rainbow Bridge, yet at the same time we are leaving the world of the one we have loved most of all. This is why we have to come back to see you. We have to be with you because we still love you very much. You would not believe how often I visit Kate and how often Clyde visits you!  He knows your thoughts, he is glad you didn’t get to say Goodbye because it’s not goodbye at all.  

Love,

Jack

The Only Way to Fail When You Have Loved a Pet

Grady and I were walking one rainy evening up one of the main streets in our town... just off the Main Street.  As we reached the place we usually crossed to take the road to the village school, a moment was captured in time. If only we could turn it back and rewind. 

Grady and I waited at the edge of the street. As we were looking both ways before crossing, we heard a voice across the street call, "Widgie!" Widgie!"  The woman was calling for her dog; a beautiful Bernese Mountain Dog. The dog was running towards the street. Fast. Towards us. It had seen Grady and I guess it was rushing out to say hello to her.  It had no clue that a car was coming from Main Street. The car was not going fast; perhaps 25 mph. The roads were slippery from the rain. The dog kept running. It all seemed in slow motion. I can count on one hand how many times I have screamed in my life, but deep out of my gut came a loud involuntary scream. The collision was inevitable.

After the impact, the dog picked itself off the road and dragged itself into the nearby bushes.  We ran over, as did the owners, and we were with it until it lay lifeless... it just took a few moments. I thought it was interesting at the time that as soon as Widgie's spirit left, Grady turned and was ready to leave too. She knew his spirit had left his body, while Widgie's family clung to him and draped themselves over him crying --- like most humans do when the final moment comes. 

There was something about the incident. I felt responsible. Jack says in his book, if he could have any wish, he would always be in the right place at the right time.  I couldn't help but think If Only! If only Grady and I hadn't been walking at that time at that place! If only we had gone the other way towards the park instead of this way towards the school.  I felt to blame.  

I took a bouquet of flowers to the people the next day. They were very appreciative. With tear-filled eyes they told me "We should have gone through obedience training; then he would have come when we called."  "We should have built a fence; he never would have been near the street."  Shoulda. Coulda. Woulda. We all do it.  The following week they were building a stockade fence. A few months later they had another dog, a Bernese also, and they were getting ready to start Obedience Training classes.  They had learned the important lesson that the loving Widgie had come to teach. 

We can get stuck on the guilt forever if we allow it to take over our minds.  Or we can learn from it and do better next time. This is what life is all about. Life is the school, love is the lesson.  We learn from every pet that comes to us what to do next time.  Eventually, if we have enough "teachers" and we are willing to learn from our circumstances, we will get it right. It will come as second nature. 

Widgie crossed Rainbow Bridge satisfied, knowing that he had fulfilled his promise. Like all other pets, he came into this life to teach. His loving "students" learned from the love of him...and the loss of him.  This is why pets don't live so long. We need enough sessions with them to get it right.  They live just long enough for us to live our lives with them and get it right.  It's all by Design and so are the circumstances.  I learned too. That's why I'm here on this blog and that's why I wrote "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master", to share what I've learned from Jack and from Grady. And from Widgie.

It's not our fault, it's just life.  We only fail if we fail to learn.