Author Kate McGahan writes every book to bring new perspective and to heal something in the reader. When you learn something new you grow, when you grow you heal. From Pet Loss to Human Grief, Soulmate Love to Alzheimer's Memoirs, Kate will bring the world of The Misunderstood into your world and your heart. Catch a glimpse of Kate's writings through this blog which features excerpts from her books, poetry over the years and responses to various events, current at the time of the writing.
Tuesday
Write a Letter to Jack
You can ask me anything. I have been here at Rainbow Bridge for awhile now; reunited with my soul family and I am happy to share with you what I know. There are a few questions that must be left unanswered because if you knew the answers they would impact the way you live and this would change your destiny. Any question is a good question, so feel free to ask. There are no silly questions and there is always an answer.
The most important thing you must remember is that if a friend or loved one has crossed the Bridge and you are sad and longing to be with them again, YOU MUST LIVE OUT YOUR LIFE ON EARTH AND LEARN THE LESSONS YOU NEED TO LEARN BEFORE YOU CAN CROSS THE BRIDGE TOO. You must grow from your life and your love and your loss. I know it's hard. That's why I'm here. If you struggle with loss, tell me about it and we'll walk you through it with love, compassion and understanding.
Join my Pet Loss Group on Facebook, Follow my Facebook Fan Page and get daily inspiration and support. More importantly read my book, "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" by Kate McGahan. Available at Amazon.com in Print, Large Print and on Kindle. It will answer questions you did not know you even had. In just a few short hours you can be on the road to healing.
Love,
Jack
To write your letter, go to "Write A Letter To Jack" on the righthand side of my Home Page and I will answer you upon receiving it. When you write it you give me permission to reprint it if I believe it will help others. If you are a private person and you don't want me to use your name or your pet's name, just let me know that and we will disguise your identity.
Sunday
Oh Ye of Little Faith.... Yes, Even You Kate
I haven't sent her a sign in awhile.
Last night she put her hands on her heart and asked me to come to her. She thought that it would be in the form of a dream, but she woke up and there had been no dream. I had something else in mind.
She took Immy and Joey out to the trail as she does each morning and as they approached she saw a small tuft of blonde hair in the middle of the trail. "Hmm." She figured it must be Immy's or Joey's from the walk the night before, but I had left her a love letter on the trail. It was my hair in the shape of a heart.
Even she didn't believe it at first, but she took a picture of it anyway. On the way back she found that it had been trampled into an "S" shape. She picked it up and held it next to Immy's fur and it was much blonder. She held it next to Joey's fur and it was much coarser. It had little glints of shine in it, like my hair had.
It may sound crazy, but WHEN YOU HAVE NO LOGICAL EXPLANATION FOR SOMETHING, THAT'S HOW YOU KNOW IT IS TRUE. Magic can happen when you live on the other side of Rainbow Bridge. We do whatever it takes to prove to you that we are still with you.
She took it home and planted it in the soil of her ficus tree.
That's not the end of the story. When she put my hair in the planter that held the tree, she stopped and looked at the tree. She realized she had not really paid attention to the tree even though she had watered and fed it regularly. Many years ago when someone gave it to her, she tied its many trunks together with landscaping ribbon so that it would stand tall and straight. She looked at that ribbon today; the ribbon that had been holding the tree together and realized that it was binding it tight. Almost suffocating it. She got her shears and cut the ribbon and the tree stayed bound and tight. We do that for awhile when we do something long enough. We stay bound even when we are set free. It stood there like a petrified soldier.
She gently pulled the branches apart bit by bit. The breeze was blowing in from the nearby doorway and it blew the leaves that had been compressed inside the tree, inside the branches that he been held so tight. The dead leaves that had been trapped fell all around the floor. The tree was open and breathing for the first time in years. She looked at the tree with amazement. She was so happy to see it so open and free.
She will be feeling better soon too because we are ALL connected. All beings. Me with her and her with me and me and her with that tree. She will be feeling better soon too! Open and free. There are so many reasons we come to you. You cannot even begin to imagine how we do what we do and why.
Look around you and your environment and see what it says about you.
You see I knew she'd share this story with you and that maybe you will feel better soon too.
Love, Jack 🐾
Last night she put her hands on her heart and asked me to come to her. She thought that it would be in the form of a dream, but she woke up and there had been no dream. I had something else in mind.
She took Immy and Joey out to the trail as she does each morning and as they approached she saw a small tuft of blonde hair in the middle of the trail. "Hmm." She figured it must be Immy's or Joey's from the walk the night before, but I had left her a love letter on the trail. It was my hair in the shape of a heart.
Even she didn't believe it at first, but she took a picture of it anyway. On the way back she found that it had been trampled into an "S" shape. She picked it up and held it next to Immy's fur and it was much blonder. She held it next to Joey's fur and it was much coarser. It had little glints of shine in it, like my hair had.
It may sound crazy, but WHEN YOU HAVE NO LOGICAL EXPLANATION FOR SOMETHING, THAT'S HOW YOU KNOW IT IS TRUE. Magic can happen when you live on the other side of Rainbow Bridge. We do whatever it takes to prove to you that we are still with you.
She took it home and planted it in the soil of her ficus tree.
That's not the end of the story. When she put my hair in the planter that held the tree, she stopped and looked at the tree. She realized she had not really paid attention to the tree even though she had watered and fed it regularly. Many years ago when someone gave it to her, she tied its many trunks together with landscaping ribbon so that it would stand tall and straight. She looked at that ribbon today; the ribbon that had been holding the tree together and realized that it was binding it tight. Almost suffocating it. She got her shears and cut the ribbon and the tree stayed bound and tight. We do that for awhile when we do something long enough. We stay bound even when we are set free. It stood there like a petrified soldier.
She gently pulled the branches apart bit by bit. The breeze was blowing in from the nearby doorway and it blew the leaves that had been compressed inside the tree, inside the branches that he been held so tight. The dead leaves that had been trapped fell all around the floor. The tree was open and breathing for the first time in years. She looked at the tree with amazement. She was so happy to see it so open and free.
She will be feeling better soon too because we are ALL connected. All beings. Me with her and her with me and me and her with that tree. She will be feeling better soon too! Open and free. There are so many reasons we come to you. You cannot even begin to imagine how we do what we do and why.
Look around you and your environment and see what it says about you.
You see I knew she'd share this story with you and that maybe you will feel better soon too.
Love, Jack 🐾
We Teach you to Love. We Prepare You for Another Pet. If You Want One.
It's a roller coaster ride. You fight with yourselves. "Should I get another pet? ...When should I get one? ... What kind should it be? ...Should I buy one or rescue one? ... Is it too soon? ...Maybe I can find my old pet,reincarnated! ...Maybe I shouldn't get another pet at all, I am so tired and weary and sad with grief..."
Then you do it. You pick out another pet to fill the space I left behind ... and some of you experience a form of Buyer's Remorse. Once you've invested in the new pet you start to question everything. It can be very complicated because you can get mad at yourself for doing it too soon and then you hold your new pet accountable. You blame them when it isn't their fault at all. You make the mistake of comparing them with me when you must know that the new one will never take my place -- in your lives or in your hearts. It isn't supposed to. It is here to teach you different lessons than the ones I taught you. It's here to teach you a different kind of love.
Don't you see? It's supposed to be this way. Relationships are assignments and when they end you are forced to graduate and move on to learn new lessons. But's it's hard. Kate used to cry when she looked at Immy (they got her 9 months after I passed) as if to say: 'Why can't you be more like Jack?' Immy isn't Jack. She'll never be Jack. No one should expect Immy to be something she isn't. I taught you unconditional love and acceptance for a reason.
It's all part of the learning -- to love again anew. Without judgment. Without comparison. It will be much easier when you have further healed from your grief. In the meantime, keep pushing through to the love and one day you'll find you love again -- but never ever the same way you did before. You may find that you are capable of loving even more than you ever dreamed. I say this because it was my task to come to earth to teach you love so that you could stretch and grow and become more than you ever were before.
If you don't have a new pet yet, don't fret about it. If you are meant to have another, it will come into your life. You won't have to jump through hoops to find it. You will be inspired and the right one will come in one way or another.
If you do have a new pet, take good care of the one who has come into your life. The one who trusts you for care and love. Be aware that quite possibly your old pet is their Guardian Angel and you don't want to make it difficult for them to watch your pain or your lack of acceptance. We often come into your life to help the new one, because we are looking for any excuse to be as near to you as possible. So when you are caring for them, you are partnering with us. We can do this together. Tears are okay as long as you are moving forward. We love and support you in your decision. Hang in there.
Jack: One Year Ago She Set Me Free
It's been just a year since she was able to release me to be free; six months after I crossed Rainbow Bridge. The moment she freed me, she found immediate relief. So did I.
She still misses me and sheds plenty of tears. Humans are so full of tears. There must be a storehouse in there! Some day I am going to write about the nature of tears. They are fascinating to me. Not all tears are alike and I have witnessed her tears of grief change over time. They used to fall, small and sharp and hard and fast, and now they are big, heavy and slow. Sometimes when they fall, she is smiling too. I am waiting for the day she can smile without tears. That will be true freedom for both of us.
She's having an especially tough day today. Who knows the reason why one day is harder than another. It is what it is. It's been 12 months since she released me from the prison of her clinging grasp. I caught her in a quiet moment on the trail that day and she was able to hear my voice. I spoke to her through the depths of her heart.
The following day she scattered the ashes, singing: "Fly Free Little Boy. Fly Free!" Oh it was music to my ears! Now I can be around her and not be unhappy. I can be proud of her and I can love her without her fears and tears blinding her to my presence. Now we can continue to learn together and grow together in a whole new way.
When we cross Rainbow Bridge we simply move into another layer of life. We are no further from you than we ever were. We are right there beside you and if you can heal your grief and let your tears subside, you will --- now and then -- be able to see me, hear me, feel me, and receive me into the new life that we are creating together; the life we will live until you join me here. It will be one quick journey through the Rainbow Bridge to the other side of the veil, where all will be revealed.
In the meantime, keep learning your lessons. You cannot join me until you have graduated from this school of earthly life that has a special program designed just for you. I was part of it. I was one of your teachers. There is more to come. You must finish it to qualify for a passage through Rainbow Bridge. I am so proud of you and can't wait to see you again in a day that will pass in the blink of an eye. You'll see. I'll be the first one there to meet you at the edge of the bridge. I never stop loving you.
Love, Jack 🐾
Saturday
Jack Advice: Never Hesitate to Make A New Friend
When Dale Carnegie was a child, he had a dog name Tippy. Later, when he was all grown up, Carnegie reported that Tippy made more friends by being interested in others than people who go to great lengths to get other people interested in them. It is something our two-legged friends learn from us, if they are paying attention.
I was a Friend to All. We met a few new friends when we stopped to rest during a day in Albuquerque, New Mexico. My Tail. Always wagging. Why not? That's what a tail is designed to do. I have always been ready to make a new friend. Why not? You never know what someone will come to mean to you.
I was a Friend to All. We met a few new friends when we stopped to rest during a day in Albuquerque, New Mexico. My Tail. Always wagging. Why not? That's what a tail is designed to do. I have always been ready to make a new friend. Why not? You never know what someone will come to mean to you.
Making New Friends...
Posted by Jack McAfghan on Monday, November 11, 2013
Love At First Sight - "Jack McAfghan" Chapter 4
In honor of Valentine's Day, here's an excerpt from "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" by Kate McGahan
She thought she knew what she wanted. She specifically came to see my little sister, but by the time she arrived my sister had been sold.
“Oh…” she said as her face fell, obviously disappointed.
My brothers hovered around her, climbing all over her and into her lap. One of them was so excited he scratched her face. I just watched them all, thinking how nice it would be to be with someone like her. I hung out in the background hoping she would notice me. The others were all quite unruly, competing for her attention. I think this is where I first learned that climbing all over someone doesn't necessarily make them want to be with you.
It looked like she was going to take my little brother home. I was preparing myself for that. She was sitting on the ground and he was sitting in her lap, sleeping like a baby. Then she looked over at me for the first time and our eyes met. I could almost feel her heart touch mine. They say you fall in love in less than a second. I can verify that this is totally and utterly true.
I was intoxicated by the feelings that I had for her, but something in my heart told me to remain calm. I retreated to my dingy little cardboard bed, turned around a few times and lay down. I rested my head on my front paws as a humble gesture and continued to steadily gaze at her. Waiting. Watching. Hoping. I tried to crawl into her mind with my thoughts so that she would want to take me home instead of my brother. I imagined the fun the two of us would have. I pictured us playing together, walking together and discovering life together. I found myself promising God that I would be a very good dog if only He would let her notice me and make her want to take me home. As she looked across the yard at me, I gently wagged my tail.
She asked them about me.
"Oh,” they said, “I don't think you want that one. He plays rough with the others. He almost killed one of the younger ones.”
I felt bad when they said that but she didn't seem bothered by it. She didn't seem bothered at all.
“I kind of like him anyway, but…” she continued, “They say sometimes a dog picks you rather than you picking the dog." She gestured toward my brother in her lap and said, "Maybe this one is picking me. Maybe I'm supposed to take him?"
Oh no, I said to her, you aren’t supposed to take him. You’re supposed to take me.
All the while she was looking over at me instead of at the one in her lap. It made me feel special, the way she looked at me.
The puppy mill lady went over to her, took my brother from out of her lap, and they continued talking. I couldn't understand what they were saying, but she kept looking over at me.
"Well, guess what?" the puppy mill lady finally said, "It’s official. All this guy wants is a warm lap. I don't think he is choosing you at all."
My heart did flip-flops! I lifted my head and looked at her in anticipation. Sure enough, she came right over to me and sat down at the edge of my cardboard bed.
“May I sit with you?” she asked.
Oh yes! I said, wagging my tail in welcome.
"I think this is the one," she said.
Oh I was so happy! I couldn't wait to go home with her! I didn't really like this place that was my first home.
Then she took me completely by surprise. She went and left me there! She talked a little more to the puppy mill lady and the next thing I knew, she was leaving! She kept looking at me with a sweet look of longing even as she walked back through the gate and closed the latch. I put my head down again, accepting the fact that I might not have a forever home.
Then she took me completely by surprise. She went and left me there! She talked a little more to the puppy mill lady and the next thing I knew, she was leaving! She kept looking at me with a sweet look of longing even as she walked back through the gate and closed the latch. I put my head down again, accepting the fact that I might not have a forever home.
♡
Sample more here or order on Amazon.com and other Amazon locations worldwide.
Friday
Kate: The Final Gift
I suppose I have another book to write one of these days -- after I finish the one after the one after the one I am writing now. I worked many years doing hospice counseling and I could tell you some stories about the final hours and moments of life. One in particular I am thinking about.
She was younger -- late 50's. Loving husband. Devoted teenage kids. She had been battling breast cancer for 15 years. She was determined to the win the battle, but she was losing. The day she decided to go on hospice was the day she decided she would take no more treatments. She was tired. She only wanted comfort care.
As her social worker, it was one of my goals to help her to find the peace in that decision. She was terrified of dying. With the support of the hospice team, she was able to come to terms with it as the end of her life on earth loomed closer and closer.
She was younger -- late 50's. Loving husband. Devoted teenage kids. She had been battling breast cancer for 15 years. She was determined to the win the battle, but she was losing. The day she decided to go on hospice was the day she decided she would take no more treatments. She was tired. She only wanted comfort care.
As her social worker, it was one of my goals to help her to find the peace in that decision. She was terrified of dying. With the support of the hospice team, she was able to come to terms with it as the end of her life on earth loomed closer and closer.
I didn't know it would be my last visit, but it was. I entered her bedroom and she was in bed, surrounded by a dozen people who loved her. She was slipping in and out of consciousness. At one point she had her eyes closed, but her expression looked as if she was listening to someone who was teaching her something she had never known before. She was obviously amazed. Her forehead would frown and then raise in wonder and amazement. Over and over again.
All of a sudden she went quiet. We all looked intently at her. We watched for her breath to come. It did. She slowly opened her heavy eyes, looking around the perimeter of her bed at each and every face that was looking back at her. No one said a word.
"I am loved and protected," she said earnestly, dreamily. "Don't worry about me. I am safe.... I am so safe." She closed her eyes and she was gone.
Gone From Our Sight.
Monday
Sunday
Raising the Bar in Reading and Writing
I have been reading and writing all of my life. My first job was with the Marcellus Public Library at the age of 14 and, while I was not a particularly strong high school student, I eventually came to score 99% on my English Regents Multiple Choice Exam. I wanted to be an English teacher, but in the late 1970's the field was full to capacity and my guidance counselor pushed me in another direction. My career path ultimately took me into Social Work... but reading, writing and teaching continued to be my passion.
Over time I became a better reader and then I naturally because a better writer too. By the time I was reading the great philosophers, my writing had improved in tandem, along with my reading skills and comprehension. I learned to thrive on learning things I never knew before and validate the things I knew that had never been put into words for me before. I found myself seeking books that contained great knowledge, truth and perspective. I entered a pathway of growth that has no end.
Now as I move forward with the writing of more books, I strive to always create the kind of books I want to read. Books with lessons scattered throughout and the ability to change the reader's perspective by its end, if not sooner. It is exciting for me to learn that many of the readers of my book, "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" have highlighted, taken notes and read and re-read the book to discover the pearls of knowledge they may have missed the first time they read it.
Life is all about love. Life is designed to teach us to love and be loved. Sometimes we learn what we need to learn from our experiences with other people, relationships with our pets and our connection with nature. Sometimes we learn what we need to grow from the pages of a really good book. Life is the School Love is the Lesson.
Over time I became a better reader and then I naturally because a better writer too. By the time I was reading the great philosophers, my writing had improved in tandem, along with my reading skills and comprehension. I learned to thrive on learning things I never knew before and validate the things I knew that had never been put into words for me before. I found myself seeking books that contained great knowledge, truth and perspective. I entered a pathway of growth that has no end.
Now as I move forward with the writing of more books, I strive to always create the kind of books I want to read. Books with lessons scattered throughout and the ability to change the reader's perspective by its end, if not sooner. It is exciting for me to learn that many of the readers of my book, "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" have highlighted, taken notes and read and re-read the book to discover the pearls of knowledge they may have missed the first time they read it.
Life is all about love. Life is designed to teach us to love and be loved. Sometimes we learn what we need to learn from our experiences with other people, relationships with our pets and our connection with nature. Sometimes we learn what we need to grow from the pages of a really good book. Life is the School Love is the Lesson.
Saturday
Can You Feel Us? We Speak To You Through Energy
Dear Jack,
I've been told to look for "signs"... That my baby is still with me and he will come to me somehow to let me know...
The day Gotti gained his wings I had the vet come to the house. I wanted him to be comfortable in his own bed..the familiarity.. His appointment was scheduled for 6pm... Last night my bedside clock stopped… This is a sign, is it not?
Love,
Tina
When humans speak to one another they speak with their voices in words that they have defined. Do you realize that the words people speak are just a small percentage of their communication? When you take away the voice, the speech, the words, there is still a great deal of communication taking place. The words are shaped in the mind; in the brain. The inspiration for speaking the words comes from the heart. The heart is the true center of genuine communication and Love is the greatest inspiration in the universe.
You may not realize it but you are communicating with us all the time, even when you aren't speaking. We watch you. We hear you. We feel you. We observe your body language. We look into your eyes. We watch your gestures and listen to your tone of voice. These are more revealing than the words that you might speak.
"Like words that sound the same but are opposite, sometimes I couldn't tell if she was laughing or crying. They kind of seemed the same. I would have to look very carefully at her eyes and her mouth. I assessed the tilt of her head and her breathing pattern. I got good at deciphering her, but sometimes even when she was laughing, tears would come out of her eyes. Humans are strange that way. They live such a dichotomy."
(Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master, Chapter 29)
You can learn to understand us too. We do not use words, but we communicate in very similar ways. We can't smile but we can wag our tail. We can't speak our joy in words but we can jump and squirm and wiggle when you come home from work. You can get hot under the collar because you are angry. We can get hot under the collar too and we might growl when we feel that way. Most of all, we speak from the heart. Our heart to yours.
After we cross Rainbow Bridge we are all magicians! We can speak in amazing and unique ways by using the power of energy connected to tangible things. While some of you can pierce the "veil" between Heaven and Earth and see and hear and know things through the power of the psyche and intuition, we know that most of you can only sense things in the physical realm, if you are aware of us at all. So we find ways to reach you. Clouds, rainbows, dreams. Lots of times things that are associated with power and energy like lightbulbs, clocks, electronics and appliances. Electricity is the closest thing on earth to what we become when we cross Rainbow Bridge. We are energy and electricity is energy so it's easiest for us to reach you through energy circuits.
Life between the worlds is much like the world of dreams. Get yourself a dream dictionary so you can refer to it when you see things in life on earth that get your attention. Metaphors and symbols are the universal language. It's how we speak to you because we can't typically express through the spoken word (although sometimes we put you in a place where nearby people will speak the words we want to say to you --- or a book will fall off a shelf whose title is something we want to tell you).
You can learn to communicate with us if you can translate what you see into what we are telling you. You can learn to speak to us not only through your words, gestures and body language but also through your heart. It is through the heart that we see, hear and feel most clearly. If you think you might have seen a sign from me, chances are you have -- or you wouldn't have even thought of signs from me. If you have goosebumps (the electricity of the skin) -- observe your thoughts and look around. It is probably me. All of us in Heaven have a goose bump "signature" and you will learn to recognize mine.
Back to our Letter to Jack. What is Gotti saying to Tina through the stoppage of the clock? Yes, 6:00 got her attention because that is the moment the vet had arrived to assist Gotti over Rainbow Bridge. "6:00" was designed to get Tina's attention so that she would share this with us so that we could teach her further how to read the signs.
Dear Tina,
There is more to this than you realize. Look at the time. The minute hand stretches to Heaven. The hour hand points to Earth. The alarm is set for a time in the future... perhaps to let you know that you are not finished "sleeping" yet.
Love,
Jack
I am everywhere. We are everywhere -- in constant contact with the ones we love.
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