Sunday, October 29, 2017
"Too much analysis
may not bring you the answers you seek,
for an intellectual route of inquiry
could prove to be a dead end now.
Nevertheless, your mind is so active that
an endless string of words could tempt you
to trust them.
Don't try to shut down the mental flow,
for that won't work.
Just recognize that
the real language of
meaning is in your heart
and not in your head."
Please Darling! Stop THINKING so much!
Monday, October 23, 2017
Chasing my memories of you!
Or are they chasing me?
It seems that you are everywhere!
...Yet you're so far away.
Please don't forget me.
You don't have the reminders that I do:
Our house, the corner coffeeshop,
The park and symphony hall;
How is it you seem to be there!
Everywhere I go,
Everywhere I am.
You maybe aren't so far away
Wednesday, October 18, 2017
I will never forget one of our Heart to Heart Support Group members was struggling terribly for a long time after the loss of her Heart and Soul dog. Her life had become one great drama, filled with great rage and relentless sadness. One day she shared that she had said to her husband, crying: "I just want my dog back." Her husband looked at her straight in the eye and replied,"I just want my wife back." This is the kind of strain grief can put on a marriage.
Some of you are struggling in your marriages and relationships because of the grief that is weighing heavily between you. It hangs heavy like a wall that seems insurmountable. Your wife may not be able to focus on what is important to you. She seems scatterbrained because she doesn't know where to put all of her feelings that come from her grief. Hubby may not know how to process his wife's -- or even his own -- emotions over the loss of a beloved pet. Men and women tend to process emotions very differently and the emotions of grief run deep.
Remember there are typically five stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. For many, these stages can be extreme. A husband may have discomfort in not knowing what to do for or say to his wife. Perhaps he is struggling too and he doesn't know how to talk about his own grief so he distances himself instead. She feels the distance and it perpetuates her anger or depression.
If this kind of behavior between you is taking place but is not typical, it is likely related to the loss at hand. By the way, for the husbands, most guys love Jack's book because he's a guy too and he writes it in such a way that they can process it quite easily. Jack will walk any reader through the stages of grief and out the other side. So if nothing else works, put our book in his hand! Most women gravitate to Jack because he's a guy that sets everything right. Jack puts everyone on the same page. Read it together. Read it to your kids. Leave it on your parent's coffee table. Do whatever you need to do to get on common ground.
Please tune into this short video (below) which discusses the difference between Men's Brains and Women's Brains by Mark Gungor. It's been around awhile but is quite funny and right on the mark. Most men and most women deal with grief very differently and if you are in a marriage or relationship that is currently strained, it's important to keep this in mind.
I also wish to add that I have addressed 'husbands' and 'wives' in this post and it seems all very traditional, but this applies to all relationships and partnerships between generations, men and women, same sex partners, siblings, parents and children of all ages. Everyone has a different way of handing stress so please keep your mind open, seek counseling if you need a little extra support --- and keep love at the forefront of everything you do.
Here's the video. I think there will be something in it that would make most people laugh, and laughter is still the best medicine of all.
Find Jack's Books highly-rated on Amazon Worldwide
Tuesday, October 17, 2017
We learn a lot from those who love us
Learn a lot from those who don't.
There's only so much you can do
With those who can't or those who won't.
Eventually you come to see
That you can do and care for them
And love them 'till the cows come home
But it won't change things either way.
So if you find you're worrisome
Take on step back and try to see
If you deserve to wait and wait
For hell to freeze
Your foresight before it's too late
To have something
To call your own
Before the cows come home.
Excerpted from the book "One Heart's Journey"
Sunday, October 15, 2017
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