Friday

Scheduled for Release This Weekend! Stay Tuned!


This is the third book in the Jack McAfghan Series. As you join Jack on his journey to Rainbow Bridge and back again, he will give you a glimpse of the world to come while sharing his deep wisdom of unconditional love and the power of healing. Our story is your story too. It is the story of life, love and renewal. What you get out of his story is limited only by your beliefs. Sometimes what seems to be the ending of something is just the beginning of everything.

'My Master calls me in from the fields of green and gold. His voice is commanding. I run to Him obediently. He gives me a choice: To remain Here and continue living life as an angel in Heaven, or to return to Earth. I hesitate. I tell Him I don’t want to leave this place, especially the field at the edge of Rainbow Bridge where I keep watch for her. I don’t want to be somewhere else the day she crosses Rainbow Bridge. He makes me a promise. I know He keeps His promises, so I begin my adventure back across the Rainbow Bridge; back into the world I shared with her.'


We highly recommend you read Jack's first book "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" before embarking on this one, for Jack will help you to heal your grief so that you can move forward into the magic that is waiting to be discovered Beyond Rainbow Bridge.


Click Here for a preview! 

Tuesday

Coming Soon: Book 3 "Return from Rainbow Bridge"

When you are grieving, you cannot really learn anything new until your mind and heart are healed and open to new information. 


In my next book Jack shares his usual wisdom and inspiration as he helps the reader to walk through the five stages of grief. Then he reveals what life is like on the other side of Rainbow Bridge. Full of love and miracles, his story will tell you how his Master in Heaven allows him the free will to make some very important choices, such as the one to return to earth to love again and be loved again.  

We also share the story of how we found Joey, Jack's little terrier brother, and how Jack was able to choreograph the adoption of Immy, the Afghan Hound who would come to be adopted into the space that Jack left behind. 

Join us as we learn together the power of love and faith. This is our story, it is your story. It is the story of life, love and renewal. Come! Be our friend as we travel this journey together to Rainbow Bridge and back again.

Coming to Amazon in 2016.

                     


"The end of this life is not the end of life." 

Wednesday

...But How Do I Let Go of You?

Q: How do you know when to cut the leash so that they can run free and have fun?
A: When you no longer feel the need to cling to them.


Q: How do you know when you are no longer clinging to them? 
A: You are no longer clinging to them when you no longer have pain over them. 
When you no longer allow yourself to suffer. 
When you have peace and you can smile when you think of them. 
When you have accepted that they are now living in another dimension,  but living nonetheless.  
You can still miss them, you can still have tender tears,  but it's the pain and suffering about it that must be severed from your being.  
The pain and the suffering weave together to create the leash.



Q: How do I cut the leash? 

A: Read my book. It will guide you every step of the way and it will free both of you. 



"Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" is now On Sale on Amazon.  Always available on Kindle for 2.99. Click HERE to order Jack today and let him bring your best friend back to you for healing. Our story is your story too.  


Click here for Amazon.UKhere for Amazon Canada and Jack is available in all other Amazon locations worldwide.


"Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" by Kate McGahan

Saturday

Jack's Sequel to be Released Soon!

A pet can never be replaced, but often our loved ones at Rainbow Bridge will lead us to the next best friend when the time is right. 

Jack's sequel, "Jack McAfghan: Return from Rainbow Bridge" is scheduled to be released this holiday season. One of the things he shares in our next book is how he brought Immy into our lives. In the meantime, his original book, "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life With My Master" will help you to process the grief and "The Lizard from Rainbow Bridge" helps you to recognize signs, angels and messengers when they present themselves in your life. They are there, all around you, if you will only open your eyes, your mind and your heart.  

"Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" is currently On Sale on Amazon Worldwide (US 9.99). Also available in Large Print and on Kindle. Give the best gift of all this holiday season; the gift of healing.    

How Do I Know When and If to Get Another Pet?

How do you know when a new pet is right for you? Have you found one and are now agonizing over the decision? Agonizing over it probably means the time isn't right.

Remember that everything feels right when a new pet is right for you. You will be put in the right place at the right time. The process is smooth and easy. Sometimes the pet will come to you without your having to do anything.  You usually feel it in your heart when its right. The price is always right because you want that pet and you will pay the price. 

Read Chapter 4 in my book. Kate went through the same dilemma. There is nothing worse than regretting this kind of decision. Of course you will have the normal What If's and perhaps some fear of commitment but there will be an underlying confidence that this is the pet for you. 

Try not to be too stressed about it. There are many many pets available out there and there will always be another opportunity. The timing will always be right. Let your heart and soul lead you to the one that's meant for you. Let your heart lead the way...not your head... or what someone else thinks 💖💖💖

Thank you for wanting to love again. We love you the way we do so that you will miss the love when we are gone (from your sight) and so that you will seek it again. After all, love is what makes everything else worthwhile. 

Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master can be found on Amazon Worldwide.




Sunday

They Sometimes Go Someplace Private to Pass...

I was recently visiting a group on Facebook where one member criticized another member for allowing her sick dog to be unattended and now unable to be located.  It inspired a deep personal memory. 



When I was 6 months old, our purebred GSD came into our family as a puppy. I was the one who cared for her most of the time. She was my first best friend. When I was 16 (and she was 16) one night we couldn't find her. I was especially worried because she was frightened of thunder and lightning storms and a storm was heading our way. I went outside, looking everywhere for her and eventually found her under a dark space under the side porch. She had tragically lost the use of her hind legs. 

I went in the house to get a card table and a blanket. I was going to sit under the table "tent" with her while the storm came so that I could comfort her. When I came out with the blanket she was gone. I couldn't believe it. How could she have gone somewhere when she had no use of her legs?! In the rain I went looking for her. I found her at the front of the house under the spirea bushes. 


She was having difficulty breathing. I stayed with her. it was my first experience with death. She may be part of the reason I went into hospice work.




I also have two friends here in Arizona who do not know each other. They both had beloved cats who were pushing 20 years of age. They both told their cats that they did not want to have to make "the decision". Both of those cats seemingly just walked away from home one day and never came back. 

Think twice before you criticize someone -- when pets have a certain amount of free will and they are perfectly aware when it's time to cross the Bridge. 

"There is an inevitable time and place at which point there is nothing in your power that you can do to change the outcome. In that certain time and place, you will simply go in your own way."    "Jack McAfghan: Reflections, A Dog's Memoir on Life After Death"



I welcome any discussion about any of this ...or feel free to share your own stories.

Saturday

The End of This Life is Not the End of Life

When you are grieving, you cannot really learn anything new until your mind and heart are healed and open to new information. 


In my next book Jack shares his usual wisdom and inspiration as he helps the reader to walk through the five stages of grief. Then he reveals what life is like on the other side of Rainbow Bridge. Full of love and miracles, his story will tell you how his Master in Heaven allows him the free will to make some very important choices, such as the one to return to earth to love again and be loved again.  

We also share the story of how we found Joey, Jack's little terrier brother, and how Jack was able to choreograph the adoption of Immy, the Afghan Hound who would come to be adopted into the space that Jack left behind. 

Join us as we learn together the power of love and faith. This is our story, it is your story. It is the story of life, love and renewal. Come! Be our friend as we travel this journey together to Rainbow Bridge and back again.

                     


The end of this life is not the end of life. 

You can find the Jack McAfghan Trilogy on Amazon Worldwide. Click Here to read the reviews and preview: 
The Jack McAfghan Trilogy by Kate McGahan

Thursday

A LIfetime of "Fodder" Quickly Turning Into Books

THE TIME HAS COME. 

I have recently consolidated three laptop computers, three smartphones, one cell phone and five notebooks 
...all filled with 100's of ideas for stories.
They are breathing down my neck now, those stories. 
They want to be written NOW and turned loose! 
It will keep me busy for the rest of my life.  

Currently I am working on the sequel to "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master"
Scheduled for release in October. 


Don't Go Getting Ideas: You Have to Walk Your Walk



"Why," you cry, "WHY? Why can't I come with you? I want to be there with you now!" So many people ask this of us. There is only one answer:

The Number One thing you need to remember is that depression and despair are part of the grief process. Even though you feel the pain will never end, it is temporary. With time and support, and reading my book "Reflections on Life with my Master" you will be guided out the other side of grief. Even though you will still miss us, you will not feel the intense pain you are feeling right now. If you try to come here sooner than you are supposed to, you will disrupt The Divine Plan. Do not interfere with it. Your arrival here is predestined, just as ours was. 

You can only cross the Rainbow Bridge when you have learned all the lessons you needed to learn in life on earth. The longer you live, the more you learn how to love. When you have learned to love (and be loved) enough, you will be granted admission. 

You are doing great. Keep going with the flow with the knowledge that we are watching you, loving you and waiting for you.

Love, Jack 🐾

Wednesday

Try to Go With the Flow


Hi, Jack here!  
I remember spending some weekends at the river. We'd hang out on the edge with our feet in the water. Quite often someone in an inner tube would come along or a colorful kayak would glide by. We'd all say "Hi!" and "Hello!"; the ones on the shore and the ones in the water. We might all have a moment to chat as they floated by --depending on the strength of the river's current -- but all too soon we were all saying "Goodbye!"  My tail would be wagging as they arrived and it would still be wagging as they had left. I was just always so happy to see everbody! Whether they coming or whether they were going!


It's kind of like life. We come and we go. It's a constant ebb and flow. 

Embrace the moment. Embrace everyone who comes your way, then be willing to let them go when it's time to say goodbye, thankful for the gift of knowing them.  

Tuesday

Keep Your Mind Open to the Signs


Those we have loved who have transitioned into Heaven are still in communication with us. They send us signs in many ways. Using the power of the World Beyond the Rainbow, they find creative ways, using energy, light, color, metaphors and more. What signs have you received? These can come in the form of Rainbows. Birds. Other animal messengers. Songs on the radio. Feathers. Books dropping off shelves. Words that other people say as you pass by. Orbs. Shadows. Light. Clouds. Dreams. 

Sunday

A Walk In The Rain Turns into a Date with Love


Written with love from Jack: 


It's the anniversary of my crossing. Late this afternoon she went out in the pouring rain. She didn't really know why she went out there, but I think she heard my heart calling her heart. She doesn't always listen she's so busy hearing with her ears and thinking with her head. Humans have to pay attention to that feeling in their gut, in their heart, or they miss a lot. 

She went right to the place where we would sit after a long hike and overlook the wash below. If you've read our book, it's the same place where I sent her the lightning bolt and the hummingbird moth so long ago.  Today as she sat there she was talking with me, tears rolling, but not crying. I covered her with my "signature" goosebumps -- It's as close I can get to hugging her full body from behind. It is always the same. I always send her the same feeling. That's how she know's it's me. She was chilled by the rain, but her back was warm with my love. "I can feel you Jack. I know you're here with me." 

As she spoke to me, she thanked me for all I have done for her and for helping everyone who reads my story. It pleases us so much -- all of us at Rainbow Bridge-- to be able to help so many people work through their grief. Her words made me so happy that I sent a most beautiful amber light that lit up our wash like it was a flood light on a stage set. It was lightning, yes, but it lingered longer than a mere bolt. Like so many miracles from Rainbow Bridge, it can't really be described. As soon as the light came, the thunder rolled from one side of the wash to the other. It rolled long and deep. Then it rolled high above her as it traveled up over the nearby mesa. 

I know she knows the truth. I was the thunder. I was the lightning too. I knew she knew it was me because when she said, "Thank you. Thank you Jack," she was crying because she knew in her heart that it all was my response to her.  

...And the brave mourning dove who usually becomes uneasy with such things and flies away, she remained in the nearby tree and stayed for the whole show. 
So many things can happen when you pay attention... and when you rise to the call.


Thursday

Jack's Sequel Is Coming Soon. Here's a Glimpse.

"Jack McAfghan: Return from Rainbow Bridge"


The end of this life is not the end of life.
Life never ends.
Love never dies. 

Stay tuned for our next book which is due for publication this Fall!

Dear Jack: How Will I Know When To Get Another Pet?


How do you know when a new pet is right for you? Have you found one and are now agonizing over the decision?  Agonizing over it probably means the time isn't right.

Some people spend hours, days, weeks, months frantically searching the Humane Society, Petsmart weekends, the internet, Petfinder and other places thinking "the One" is out there somewhere and they don't want to miss it. The process can be emotionally exhausting, even though there is some merit to it (it pulls your forward out of your grief and starts you thinking about the future instead of concentrating on the past). The right pet will find you when the time is right. 

This is another situation you must approach calmly. You need to be in the right state of mind. I heard once, "If you want something in the worst way, that's how you'll get it."  Sometimes humans can get very depressed and make decisions they would not otherwise have made. One must be cautious. Hitting the bottom of grief can be By Design... so that you want to reach out. Because you miss the unconditional love so much you don't know how to live without it. We are not meant to go through life all alone. Sometimes Hitting Bottom is designed to remind you that God is there waiting for you. Sometimes it's because someone else, perhaps a new four-legged friend, is there waiting for you too. Sometimes you turn around, look the other way towards the bright side ... and find them right in front of you waiting for you.


Be cautious because you want a pet who fits your lifestyle and when you make decisions amidst grief, depression or other complex emotions, you can make a mistake. Depression robs you of your energy, so now is probably not the time to be looking for an 8 week old puppy that will need 1-2 years of training! You don't have the energy for that. You think it might be a great adventure to take your mind off your loss, but think again. Puppy training could ultimately overwhelm you even more....and it will be a long haul before they are a stable and mature.  Many people in this situation ultimately end up surrendering their new pets because the training can take it's toll. You need to take care of YOU and the right pet will take care of you too.  In this case, getting a mature pet who is already trained would be a much better choice. The very fact that you are thinking seriously about getting another pet means you are getting closer to getting one.


Remember that everything feels right about it when a new pet is right for you. You are put in the right place at the right time. The process is smooth and easy. Sometimes you don't even have to DO anything. The pet will come to you. When it's right, you feel it in your heart. The price is always right because you want that particular one and you will pay the price.  You'll see. You won't believe this until it happens to you. 

My Kate went through the same dilemma. There is nothing worse than regretting this kind of decision. Of course you will have the normal "What If's" and perhaps some fear of commitment but there will be an underlying confidence that this is the pet for you. There are many pets available that need loving homes and there will always be another opportunity. The timing will always be right. Let your heart and soul lead you to the one that's meant for you. Let your heart lead the way...not your head... or what someone else thinks you should do. 


Are you starting to think about it more and more? Your time is coming. Your heart and soul pet is taking care of all of this Behind the Scenes. Your pet knows you better than anyone does. You pet knows where you are and what you need.  Put yourself in her paws, take an honest look at yourself and your life and ask yourself... what kind of pet do you need? Then you hold that picture in your mind and your heart and soul will bring that pet to you. Talk to your pet at Rainbow Bridge. Ask that pet to help you; to lead you to the right one.   



Keep in mind that there will always be people who will tell you what they think you should do. They will tell you it's too soon or you're taking too long,  They might say, "Just get another dog." or "I know of a dog who needs a home. Why don't you just take it?"  They are well-intended but they do not understand the level of love you have shared with your pet.  Try to realize the fact that if they didn't care about you they wouldn't say those things. They want you to be happy and it's all they know to do. To them A Dog = A Dog so therefore A Dog, any dog, will make you happy again. Try to forgive them for They Know Not What They Do. 

Thank you for wanting to love again. We love you the way we do so that you will miss the love when we are gone (only from your sight) and so that you will seek it again. It's all about the love. 

Love, Jack 🐾 


Tuesday

Words Can Create A New World


When the right words are used in the right way, 
you can see, hear, taste, feel and be inspired by them. 

THE LIZARD from RAINBOW BRIDGE: Our Latest Book


If you've read our book, you know about my friend Lizard. Our illustrated story will help you to learn how animal spirits and angels come into our lives. They are all around you, all the time! Who'd believe a lizard could be an angel too?

Click Here to See Lizard on Amazon.com
Available Worldwide
Animal spirit guides and angels serve each and every one of us every day. Join Jack McAfghan as he shares the magical story of his friend Lizard, an unexpected angel who travels from Heaven to escort others over Rainbow Bridge and to comfort those left behind. In the style we have come to know and love, the canine Jack shares his wisdom and the power of unconditional love for all. His ultimate goal: to teach us to live Heaven on Earth. This true story is written for children of all ages. It hopes to bring to light the knowledge and faith that magic exists everywhere in the world and that the end of this life is not the end of life at all.

TRUE STORY. 

Letting Go: Try to See it From Your Pet's Point of View


When Kate and I worked for Hospice, we went to visit a family who had an elderly father at home. They had an old dog that was sick too. Her name was Blanca. I looked into Blanca’s eyes and I saw so much sadness there. It was more than sadness; I can't come up with an English word for it.

While Kate talked to the man and his family, I talked with Blanca. She told me that she was ready to cross over but that her master had begged her not to leave. Her master was asking her to stay, so she was staying. A dog is obedient above all else.


I learned that Blanca felt totally helpless. She was tired of living. She wanted to be free of her cumbersome body. She felt trapped. She loved her family but she suffered from a deep and painful longing to return Home. Her heavenly Master was calling for her but her earthly master was clinging to her. It was painful for her to be pulled in two different directions. She knew that I would understand. I felt very bad for her. I hoped that I would never have to live that way.
from Jack McAfghan, Reflections - Chapter 49

Love, Jack 🐾


Thursday

Amazon Ranked #17 : Still She Grieves


A note from Kate:

Jack made it to #17 in Pet Loss on Kindle today!  Oh Jackie! It makes me so happy! 

It's not about selling a book for $2.99. It's about giving the priceless gift of healing the those who read your story. Everyone who knew you, loved you Jack. They are still meeting you and loving you through the pages of our book. Thank you Jack. Thank you for bringing all the pets who have been loved and lost back for healing for our readers.

But wait. If I'm so happy about it, why am I crying as I post this? 
Me the expert?!  Still crying?  It will be two years in August since you crossed the Rainbow Bridge. I know I am healing because I no longer count the hours, the days, the months since you left....they are getting away from me. Where has the time gone? Why do I still cry?


The process of grief can take a long time when love runs deep.  I see this face, these eyes, this love, the offering of everything he is and was. He wanted to give me everything.  He still does. Just like our Master in Heaven does, He gives all of us everything He is. This is why pets are our greatest gift. They live for their master on earth. We are their Beloved. They are each and every one a little piece of Heaven sent to us to bless us, love us and be loved by us. It's all by Design so we know without a doubt that we are Loved. It's all about the love and the love that is waiting for us at Rainbow Bridge when the time is ripe for us to return Home.  

I am so grateful to the many readers who have become our friends. For the old and new friends who are following Jack's Page. I am thankful for the members of Jack's Pet Loss Group. So many of you have thanked me for all that I do but I thank you for all you do for me. For all you have come to mean to me. I have received so many blessings from the loss of the greatest gift I have been given so far in this lifetime. We are all healing each other, one day at a time.

It's all about the Love. 

Kate 


"These three things remain: Faith, Hope and Love...
but the greatest of these is love."  
1 Corinthians 13:13  

Sunday

PTS PD Euthanization ... and GUILT

Dear Jack: I feel so much guilt after I euthanize a pet because, in essence, I am giving the order to kill them. I know, I know it's in their best interest but it's still so hard.

This is for anyone who believes that they took a life away. You loved enough to let the one you love go.  You freed them from being bound to a life that no longer served them. Read Jack's wisdom. You need only shift your perspective to know the truth of the matter. 

Jack, when you know that you did the right thing, there is a certain amount of guilt. Your absolutely right though. I couldn't bear to see him suffer.

Yes, there is always guilt for everyone in our life who leaves here. The key is to let it go, not dwell on it.  When they look back at us, they do not see the things we feel we could have done better. They look back on us only with love, knowing we did our very best and knowing that we loved them.


Some people say they put their pets 'down' when they are really Lifting Them Up. 'Putting To Sleep' is a much better term even though it's still kind of backwards. Whatever words you use to describe it, you are helping us. Don't ever question your decision again. It's the most loving thing you can do, to help us on our way Home.


Wednesday

A Story from Jack: Not a Single Sparrow Can Fall...

"Not a single sparrow can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it." 
(Matthew 10:29) 


The finches have been building their nest in the eaves of the roof. Today the female flew into the window and Kate found her, still alive. She ran to get a towel and she gently picked up the finch and held it close as a huge amount of heat escaped the tiny creature's body.  It happened the same way when I passed; a great heat went through Kate as I made my transition.  

Heat is energy manifest. The heat is the infinite life force energy that was leaving the bird as it's immortal spirit expanded out into the universe.  I have told you in my book and I will tell you again now: 

Heaven is not somewhere Up In The Clouds high in the sky. Heaven is all around you! The moment that bird took it's last breath, it's spirit left it, in the form of heat, and immediately went out into the Heaven that surrounds all things. This is why I am still here. We are all here, all around you.  
There is no Heaven UP THERE -- HEAVEN IS HERE, ALL AROUND!  


Kate held the bird, cupping her hands around its tiny body, holding it close to be sure that it knew that it was loved as it left. After all, we carry the last moments of life with us into the next one and it's very nice when the transition is made with love. 


Then Kate cried. It was like a Little Journey of Grief for her. She blamed herself because she feeds the birds and if the bird feeder hadn't been there, the finch might not have flown into the window at all. She thought of the nest and she cried as she watched the male finch with red breast flying back and forth at the eave of the roof. She told him what happened as tears rolled down her face. She wondered if there were eggs in the nest and she worried for them too.  She cried slow gentle tears for this tiny bird and it's mate. 


Then she took her little shovel and buried the finch in a soft hole underneath the tree in the side yard. She lined the hole with silken rose petals.  They too were dying and needed to know that they were loved. It's all about the love for every living thing.  


She returned to the scene where a tiny grey feather remained. She picked up the feather and tossed it onto the breeze.  
"Fly free, little girl!" 
The feather wafted and lifted and soon floated out of sight. 

This all happened on the same deck that I used to love. 
Lots of magic and love took place here and it will always hold the energy of these memories. 

I'll be meeting this little bird soon. I will love this bird forever because 
my master loved her and cared for her for just a few moments. We are all connected. I love my master, my master loves me and I will love this bird because she loved this bird.
And just you wait and see; this bird will love me!  

I Love You. 
Love, Jack 🐾

Tuesday

We are Not Gone, Only Gone From Your Sight

When I say we are not gone, only gone from your sight, this is what I am talking about.  

We are like the sun. We are there with you and then we rise up like the sun and even though you cannot see us, we are there. With you. We are always there. We never go away. If it seems we go away for just a little while, we always come back around again.  
Always. Forever. Until we meet again. 


Saturday

So Do Pets Go To Heaven or Not???


Dear Jack (I can't believe I am writing a letter to a dog):
No animal goes to heaven. St. Thomas stated and the Church approves: "The soul of an animal after death returns to the potency of matter." Anything contrary is simply fiction and nonsense.
Anon E Mouse


Dear Anon, 
Now that I am in Heaven, I join the common mind which knows Everything.  That said, since you are a doubter (much like the St.Thomas who you refer to in your note to me), I will provide a link to a reputable source to reveal the Truth. As an apostle of Jesus Christ, St. Thomas was transformed from doubter to believer. Click here to read more about that.  

I also would like to clarify that we do not "live" at Rainbow Bridge. A lot of people think we do. Rainbow Bridge is just the passageway by which we reach the Other Side. The other side is Heaven.  We cross the Bridge and we wait for you on the other side. When it's your time to cross the bridge into Heaven, we are the first ones waiting at the edge of Rainbow Bridge to greet you. So yes, we live in Heaven.

But 'How do you know that pets go to Heaven?' you ask. 
How do I know? ...

 I know because The Bible tells me so. 

I know because animals have a soul and souls return to Heaven when they are done experiencing life on earth. 


I know... because animals have eyes in which you can see the entire universe. If Eyes Are The Windows Of The Soul, this is further proof that animals have a soul. 


I know this because Pope Francis (like his beloved namesake, St. Francis) tells me so. 

Source: ABC Nightly News and Google Images. 

I KNOW. I mostly know because I know where I am. I am there. I am Here. I am in Heaven. I am in Life Everlasting. I AM Life Everlasting. We all are.

"Life goes on and something is always turning into something else. I now know this for sure: Love is all there is and love never dies. Love is energy and energy does not die; it cannot die. Einstein would tell you that it is a proven scientific fact. If it’s energy, it must live, although sometimes it changes form.

Love does not sleep. I am not dead. I am awake."
("Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master" Chapter 66)


Now Kate knows -- without a doubt-- because she wrote my book and she never planned on writing it. She never planned on my reaching out to her to give her a message to give the rest of the grieving doubting world. 


I know because I know.

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